Part of me wishes I had not started this post - I have health news articles backing up on me! - but I am also showing you a technique I learned long ago that helps you deal with losses or challenges and that is to explain it in writing -
As I begin part two, I realize that the processing isn’t really going the way I expected and I guess that is what “journaling” is meant to do – to help us work through our thoughts and responses as we describe real events. But about two weeks before the race, when my foot flared up, I started to think I was never going to do this again, that it takes so much planning, effort, struggle and then so much can go wrong before the day gets here or on the day itself - but that part is starting to fade from my memory - the way the pain of child birth fades and women decide to do it again.... The more I write, the more I think it was my mind that let me down, more than my body and that if I fixed a few things – I could make this happen. So I write now with conflicting voices, the one that wants me to accept a different and equally challenging path and the one that wants me to keep adjusting the recipe until I get the distance right. But we were still on Saturday when we left off….
The day before Gasparilla…
I remember now that as I went to bed on Friday I felt a tightening in my head, a headache I thought, “where did that come from?” It was still there when I woke on Saturday and my sinuses were a bit congested. I used one of those breathe easy strips that had come in my registration packet goodie bag. It REALLY worked, but sort of freaked me out, so I took it off before I had my little four mile run. The run was FINE, and afterwards it began to rain and that rain was pretty heavy at times. I packed my food for the day, all but dinner. I planned everything and to eat every couple of hours. I was careful all week to hydrate. My plan for dinner was grilled salmon and veggies – not a pasta carbo loader – but I had other carbs all day. As I said I went to a conference and presented on motivational interviewing for behavior change – HA – my power point would not open for the presentation – I had spent many hours, mostly on Saturdays, creating the PPT.
My trip to the Tampa Convention Center was without incident – love my Garmin Nuvi as much as I love my Garmin running GPS. The race expo would close at 3pm and I needed to pick up my packet with instructions, bib and timing chip. Getting a parking spot in downtown with so many other people at the event was a challenge. Most lots were asking 10 to 20 dollars for parking. I finally gave in to a 5$ lot. When I got out of my car, the sign said “please pay the honor box”. [my massage therapist had told me that after the race I needed to have a special message on my quadriceps that would flush out the toxins – the race info said that MTs would be available for 12 dollars for ten minutes or something – I had about 17 or 18 dollars in cash] I decided to go and get my packet first and read more about this honor box thing when I was finished and I also thought I might come across an ATM or buy something and get change. That didn’t happen. I did get my packet and I looked at all the vendor booths – I did not buy anything – I never reward myself BEFORE an event. I did see a tee shirt that I wish I could remember exactly, but it said something like “it takes courage just to show up at the start of a marathon”. I would repeat that to myself many times. I also stopped at the pacer table. In half and full marathons, they have volunteers who agree to run at a set pace the entire way so that a person doesn’t go out too fast or slow for an event allowing them to finish at the time that is best for their body. Olympic level runners can finish a marathon in just over two hours – that is a 26.2 mile run. The cut off for runners is 7 hours. Many of my friends can do it in 3-4 hours and I can do it in 5 or less. My longest training run for this race was 18 miles, as I’ve said and I did that in a 10:18 pace, faster than I have done it before – so I thought I would hang with the 4:45 group which was to run at a 10:53 pace. I didn’t commit in writing but my plan was to find that group at the start. The pacers hold long sticks with the finish time on one side and pace time on the other. I had trained almost exclusively on my own, so this would be unique and I believed very helpful. (I had hoped to find my friend Martha, but at the same time I was avoiding some of my running club because of my fear of failure. I ran the Sarasota with Martha and I don’t know why – well, I probably would have if I had found her – but that is the Sunday part and we are still on Saturday). Back to the parking lot – I went to the box and it said to put your money in and get a slip to put on your dashboard. Well, I could easily have not done that – there were no gates, not attendants, etc. Between the ghost of my father, and the risk of really bad karma, I could not do this. I paid 5 bucks for a pass that expired that night and then drove to the Howard Johnson where I was charged another 8 dollars for parking.
The hotel. I had been very specific in finding an hotel, after the two closest to the race were full. This one was only a mile away and according to hotels.com I could get a no smoking room and a fridge, microwave and internet access. I was so concerned that the amenities and location might not be as listed that I called customer service and spoke with a representative who checked everything out and assured me that all was as it appeared and she booked my room. At the time, it seemed that no one else from the race would be there as all the nice hotels were full, and that was where my running club friends, and Martha, were as well.
Wrong I was, there were two counter clerks and a line to check in. I had a mini back pack, a reusable bag (from the race registration – packed full) my lunch box and my laptop in the car. I waited in line for 20 minutes and then parked my car and carried all my stuff to my room. [PS I confirmed that there would be a shuttle to the race at 5:30 Sunday morning) My room was dingy. It had the smell of too much air freshener but I told myself it was NOT bad – all would be okay. Then I saw that there was no fridge and no microwave. I had not unpacked a thing – but at this point 3:30 it was seeming to be a long day. I called the desk to explain and the man who answered said, “ok ma’am come down stairs and we can see about your concern.” That was a bad sign – why didn’t they just bring me a microwave or move me, why did I have to come downstairs? I will tell you why – to stand in the LINE again for no less than another 20 minutes. So now I am drinking my diet soda and eating my kudos bar still standing and posting to face book on my blackberry. Well, they are not sure what they can do, but they will try to find a microwave in an out of service room and bring it to me – as I no longer care about the refrigerator. Ah, and guess what, they will take the 8 dollar charge for parking off my bill. Again I asked, “What time will you take people to the race tomorrow – 5:30 the driver will be here.”
About ten minutes later, I received a phone call and they moved me to another room. It was on the top floor and it was exactly what I expected it to be when I booked my room. Sigh – happy. My lap top even connected to some unsecured wireless portal so that I could BLOG that night. Unfortunately, the hotel restaurant was a bust. OK, I found a Bonefish Grill and ordered my food for take out. The only other thing to do was email my Mom. And for that to really make sense, I have to tell you the pizza story… which seems a good place to stop.
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